I am staying in a dorm with 3 other people and I am the only one that is even considering coming back to Columbia College next semester. One is going back home, one is going to go to community college for a semester and then coming back and one is switching colleges permanently. I am not doing so well on the college front. I am having problems keeping myself on task. The internet and tv are very distracting and at college I have no one breathing down my neck telling me to do my work.
I find myself with 18 day left in the semester and I am freaking out. I have to work on two short films, write approximately 9 different papers, at least two of which are research papers, and edit a short interview segment. I know that doesn't sound like much, but trust me it is. One of the papers is on Francis Ford Coppola and the way he uses long/wide shots int he middle of scenes to increase drama. (at least that's what its about right now, but that's kind of hard to show with research). The rough draft was due last Friday and I haven't actually started on it. I'm working on the research part right now more than the actual writing, so i need to get on that. The two films are directed by two other students and they cannot get their acts together. So, my job as far as that goes is to remind them repeatedly that we have 18 days until the final cut is due. One of the films has not been cast and the other is being filmed in Indiana and I was supposed to be filmed on Sunday, but the shoot was cancelled. Do you know how annoying that is!!!! I was supposed to be done with my part of one of the films, by now, but no. So now as far as that goes I am just playing the waiting game. It's actually really fucking annoying.
So I am dealing with all of this and then I am dealing with the very real certainty of living with three brand new different people next semester and that's not really problem, except what if we don't get along. Besides which I am actually worried about my grades. For two reasons: one if I get lower than a C in either of my film classes, then I have to take them both over again,which would suck. Two, I really don't want to start my college career on academic probation. Argh. I have been thinking about going back home next semester and going to community college and getting all of my general education credits in. But that feels like a cop out and I am not sure that I'm ok with that. I don't know. It's hard I have yet to make any friend here, except my roommate and now she's not going to be here next semester. So great.... now I'm at college and I'm going to be that creepy person without friends. I just don't know what to do. I mean obviously I need to buckle down and just start doing as much of this work as I can, so that I can get through this semester and hopefully come in over the grade of C, so that I can continue on in the school.
If I go back home and go to community college, I want it to be next semester,because one of my best friends is still a senior in high school and I could hang out with her at least. I just don't know. I think I would be disappointed in myself, ifI had to go home, but to be totally honest I am already disappointed with myself, because I thought that college would be different and at the very least I would be good student. I should have realized that habits don't change just because your location does. Plus I think that I might have over passed the allowed absents in my First Year Seminar class, so fuck!!!! I'm going to email my teacher and check, because he likes me and I think that maybe he won't fail me. I hope. I just needed to vent and now I need to work and get something done, because when I accomplish something I get more motivated to continue working.
I find myself with 18 day left in the semester and I am freaking out. I have to work on two short films, write approximately 9 different papers, at least two of which are research papers, and edit a short interview segment. I know that doesn't sound like much, but trust me it is. One of the papers is on Francis Ford Coppola and the way he uses long/wide shots int he middle of scenes to increase drama. (at least that's what its about right now, but that's kind of hard to show with research). The rough draft was due last Friday and I haven't actually started on it. I'm working on the research part right now more than the actual writing, so i need to get on that. The two films are directed by two other students and they cannot get their acts together. So, my job as far as that goes is to remind them repeatedly that we have 18 days until the final cut is due. One of the films has not been cast and the other is being filmed in Indiana and I was supposed to be filmed on Sunday, but the shoot was cancelled. Do you know how annoying that is!!!! I was supposed to be done with my part of one of the films, by now, but no. So now as far as that goes I am just playing the waiting game. It's actually really fucking annoying.
So I am dealing with all of this and then I am dealing with the very real certainty of living with three brand new different people next semester and that's not really problem, except what if we don't get along. Besides which I am actually worried about my grades. For two reasons: one if I get lower than a C in either of my film classes, then I have to take them both over again,which would suck. Two, I really don't want to start my college career on academic probation. Argh. I have been thinking about going back home next semester and going to community college and getting all of my general education credits in. But that feels like a cop out and I am not sure that I'm ok with that. I don't know. It's hard I have yet to make any friend here, except my roommate and now she's not going to be here next semester. So great.... now I'm at college and I'm going to be that creepy person without friends. I just don't know what to do. I mean obviously I need to buckle down and just start doing as much of this work as I can, so that I can get through this semester and hopefully come in over the grade of C, so that I can continue on in the school.
If I go back home and go to community college, I want it to be next semester,because one of my best friends is still a senior in high school and I could hang out with her at least. I just don't know. I think I would be disappointed in myself, ifI had to go home, but to be totally honest I am already disappointed with myself, because I thought that college would be different and at the very least I would be good student. I should have realized that habits don't change just because your location does. Plus I think that I might have over passed the allowed absents in my First Year Seminar class, so fuck!!!! I'm going to email my teacher and check, because he likes me and I think that maybe he won't fail me. I hope. I just needed to vent and now I need to work and get something done, because when I accomplish something I get more motivated to continue working.